(I wrote this and posted it on Facebook in 2021 and thought to share on our blog as we celebrate LOVE during the month of February.)
As parents, we usually earn instant popularity when we respond to our children’s questions— “Can I have it? Can I go? Can I do it?”—is yes. In those moments, we’re heroes.
But the moment the answer is no, our favor seems to disappear just as quickly. Suddenly we’re “mean,” “unfair,” or “don’t understand.”
What our children often cannot see is that our no is rarely about denial—it’s about protection, purpose, and preparation for something better.
They celebrate us for the YES! They resist us for the NO!
And that raises a deeper question for all of us:
Is God still good when His answer is no?
Do we praise Him only for the yes?
Or can we trust Him, thank Him, and remain content—even when the answer we receive is not what we wanted?
Because the truth is this:
“No” is still an answer.
When I look back over my life, I can clearly see that many of the times I heard “no,” it actually served me well. Those closed doors positioned me for better opportunities. Because of certain “no’s,” I was redirected into spaces, relationships, and friendships that enriched my life in ways I could not have planned on my own.
Sometimes, “no” is not rejection—it’s redirection.
“No” also reveals our heart and our character. It exposes what’s really inside of us. If we’re honest, when we hear “no,” we can feel hurt, disappointed, frustrated—even tempted to pout or throw a quiet (or not-so-quiet) tantrum. “No” challenges us. It tests how we will respond and what we will do next.
As a parent, even now, when I have to say no, I sometimes brace myself—because I already know the response probably won’t be, “Thank you for telling me no—you’re the best!” (Wouldn’t that be nice? But let’s be real—that hasn’t been my everyday experience.)
And it makes me wonder—does God ever brace Himself for our reaction when His answer is no?
Yet, in His love, He stays with us in that moment. He knows His “no” is working for our good—even when we cannot see it. He stands firm, not out of harshness, but out of wisdom. He understands what we don’t yet understand.
Then, over time, perspective catches up with purpose.
We eventually look back and say,
“God, thank You for that no.
Now I see why You didn’t allow it.
You knew what was best for me—even when I didn’t.”
I am genuinely grateful for the many “no’s” I received—from both God and my parents. Some of those answers protected me. Some redirected me. Some quite possibly saved me.
“No” is not the absence of love. Often, it is love with foresight.
So, instead of fighting every “no,” what if we allowed it to work for us instead of against us?
Because sometimes the very answer we resist is the one that is quietly positioning us for something greater.
Romans 8:28—When God says no, he is working out everything for your good. He truly knows what is best for you and I. Isaiah 46:9-11- when God makes a choice, he doesn’t make any mistakes.
Just a quiet morning reflection before the day begins.
Keep Shining!!!
Robin
Inspire. Hope. Shine!
